The "Vintage Insult" Classic 🎂🖕

For the friend who appreciates brutal honesty over sugary sentiments, there is the "You’re Old as F*ck" birthday card. Part of the hilariously irreverent collection by Bad Betty Greeting Co., this card ditches the "over the hill" clichés for a direct, vintage-inspired jab. It is the perfect choice for a best friend, a sibling, or an ex-husband with a thick skin and a great sense of humor.

Featuring a retro-style illustration and a "precision die-cut" finish, this card feels like a high-quality keepsake—until they read the front.

Why It’s a Total Crowd-Pleaser (For the Right Crowd):

• Vintage Charm, Modern Sass: Combines a classic mid-century aesthetic with a very modern, very blunt birthday wish.

• Premium Quality: Printed on soft-touch cardstock that feels luxurious in the hand, ensuring the quality is as high as the insult is low.

• Blank Inside: Leaves plenty of room for you to double down on the jokes or (if you must) add a rare moment of actual sincerity.

• Complete Gifting: Includes a professional A2 kraft envelope, so it’s ready to be mailed or handed over the moment you’ve signed it.

Product Specifications:

Styling Tip for the Birthday "Roast":

Tuck this card into a gift bag alongside the Retro 80s Arcade Machine Keyring to really lean into that "vintage" theme. If they are truly feeling the weight of their years, pair it with the Energy Clearing Aura Quartz Wand so they can "clear out" some of that old-age grumpiness. It’s a guaranteed way to make their birthday unforgettable—even if their memory is starting to go!

Ready to deliver the ultimate birthday burn?